Nothing like getting sick in the heat of the summer, but I'm back with a re-write of one of my most controversial posts.
Thanks Anna Cade from www.herdingcats-burningsoup.com and Sandra Cox at http://sandracox.blogspot.com !
In addition to getting yucky feedback from strangers when it comes to topics of abuse, friends and family avidly debate with me about my views. Uh...ok.
If this is happening in your world, it is NOT your fault and you are NOT alone! I visited a Blog months ago that has become my new best friend, and it's called: www.chumplady.com . In a word - WOW! This site has its pulse on cheating and everything associated with it. In addition, her readers are REAL people sharing pain, anger, feelings of remorse and even a few smiles. If you feel as if you're all alone, and that no one feels your pain, visit her site when you can.Words of Wisdom - her blog is busy and there are a ton of comments, but you WILL get support.
Sadly, abuse runs rampant in today's society. Many have grown to accept verbal degradation or cheating by minimizing it, laughing about it or pretending it doesn't exist. In addition, seeing someone with a black eye or a broken arm/leg may cause someone to whisper, but nothing is ever really done about it. Living with someone who gradually changes into a person you no longer know is tragic. While cheating displays no blatant visible signs, the emotional degradation is mindblowing. Neighbors talk, and family tries to shield you from what's really going on behind your back. Domestic abuse in any form is very real, demeaning, harmful and potentially dangerous to you or someone you love. Please don't ignore it.
I've heard all kinds of reasons of why people ignore monogamy while married, but no excuse is valid to me. I have zero tolerance for cheating. I read a lot and watch a ton of movies, but if either hints at a situation where someone who is married is cheating, that movie is turned off, and the book gets tossed aside. I see it as a total betrayal to the marital vows, and lose all respect for that person. These rigid beliefs can sometimes cause problems, and I've lost friends. These are people I can no longer trust to be honest.
We can offer words of encouragement and be there when needed. This includes lifting a person up and not judging.Sometimes a person doesn't want advice, and only wants you to listen. Be that good friend. Support is key.