Sunday, January 6, 2019

DO FRIENDSHIPS HAVE AN EXPIRATION DATE?

According to a recent survey from the University of Scranton, 80% of people fail to keep their New Year's resolutions, so for the past 4 years mine have successfully been either book, or social media driven. 
I stay away from actually making formal resolutions about losing weight, but it's still in my head, and maybe in one of my planners, because I know I'm just going to screw it up.(lol)

Webster defines a friend as "a person you have a strong liking for and trust, a person who is not an enemy".  Another definition indicates there is a bond of mutual affection and is exclusive of sexual or family relations.


Wouldn't it be great if friendships lasted forever and ever?  I've been fortunate to have quite a few friends for 20+ years, and it's still going strong. Friends who are constructively honest and  supportive are great, and make us the best persons we can be.  It's also neat when friends have different views and interests because that's a great way to learn new things. Even though these things haven't happened to me, the instances mentioned below have happened to other people I know, and it's so sad.

Friends shouldn't get a pass to say/do mean-spirited or underhanded things, or to cheat and secretly text with your husband/wife or boyfriend/girlfriend. They're not going to do or say things behind your back to intentionally hurt you. It's also very uncool for a friend to give you something, only to come to your house every Christmas to take your gifts back, and then re-gift them to others because you haven't used some of the items fast enough. Is your relationship one-sided? When confronting your friends, at the very least there should be some sign of remorse or an apology to address the hurt feelings. If you've got friends like this, or worse, 2019 is your year to quickly run in the other direction.  No one deserves these types of headaches.


SOAPS
Have you ever watched a soap opera?  Do you remember All My Children which started in 1970?  Susan Lucci, as Erica Kane was super popular and nominated 19 times for an Emmy before finally winning in 1999.  On the soap, she was married to 6 different guys, but in real life, she's been happily married to Helmut Huber since 1969!  The series ended on television in 2011, but the online version ended in 2013.


COLORS
Have you ever heard of Blue Zones?  These areas are home to some of the healthiest and oldest people in the world, with many living to be 90-100+ years of age.  I would definitely have to give up my cheeseburgers, because almost all of these places emphasize plant based food, beans, fruits and veggies as part of their diets.(lol)  Also, walking, resting and family bonding are part of their lifestyles.

I'd just like to point out that there are NO cold places on this list, and you know I love cold weather.(lol)

1.  Sardinia Italy
2.  Okinawa Japan
3.  Ikaria Greece 
4.  Loma Linda California
5.  Nicoya Costa Rica


FREEBIES
In addition to coupon shopping, which I've been doing for years, I love finding freebies on the Internet along with my good buddy Mary over at scarymarythehamsterlady.blogspot.com/ who shares her freebie haul every Friday.  In the UK, there are  these great freebie sites:

https://www.latestfreestuff.co.uk,  

https://www.magicfreebiesuk.co.uk

In the US, try www.sampables.com, freebieshark.com, or reddit.com. Here are a few things I've picked up over the past couple months.
Sephora


2019 Calendar

2019 Calendar

This stands your phone up and is super cool.

Hummus


Can't say this seaweed was my fave-lol
These wipes worked perfectly




This coffee was pretty good and did suppress the appetite.



Carlie C's Friday Freebie - What is Sipping Soup?(lol)

Cat Food I'll be giving away
Yay!  Tea


Nice perfume














These are my 2019 Planners that I love, and I thank my good friend Elizabeth from alteredbooklover.blogspot.com
for sending me lots of amazing stickers to use this year.  

.

Not guaranteeing anything(lol)













Sara Bareilles said it well in 2013, and it works this year too. "You can be amazing , and I want to see you be BRAVE"







73 comments:

  1. Good post. New year's resolutions - no thank you! True friends are good, but rare. Have a great new year! Hugs, Valerie

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    1. Hope your new year is fantastic too Valerie! Hugs...RO

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  2. Happy New Year, RO! "All My Children," "One Life to Live," and "General Hospital" -- the Triple Play of soap operas. GH seems lonely without its TV buddies.

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    1. I remember all those and my mom used to love them so much. True - so many are gone now. Happy New year to you too! RO

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  3. HaHa! Well..l'm gonna try and cheer this up a bit...
    Friends..Friendship..Neah! Never! I've never had a
    close human, as a friend..note the word human! :).
    I do..acquaintanceship's...totally different thing...
    I won't go on about it..it just a personal thing...!

    Arrrrh! Soaps! They should be banned..like fireworks..
    The amount of ladies/women/females..run their lives
    on them, we have them over here, three/four times a
    day, there taken seriously, if someone is killed,
    dies, the public, who watch such rubbish..send flowers!
    There viewers have the IQ of a rocking horse..Jeeeeese!

    AND..needless to say..l take absolutely 'NO' notice of
    Statistics...Where do these people get their figures
    from, to be divided by another set of figures..how many
    people do they question, then take an average, then
    divide it by the...Hang on! Hang on! I'm loosing it here!
    HeHe! Lets forget it...!!! :o).

    Crocodiles are easy.
    They try to kill and eat you.
    People are harder.
    Sometimes they pretend to be your friend first.

    Three friends, stranded on a desert island, find
    a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them
    each one wish.
    The first friend wishes he was off the island and back
    home.
    The second friend wishes the same.
    The third friend says "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were
    back here."

    Friendship is a lot like nature. You only have as many
    animals as the ecosystem can support and you only have
    as many friends as you can tolerate the bitching of...!

    HeHe! There Ya Gooooooo! :). I best be off..before l get
    thrown off...Bless!x Oh! And! Happy New Whats It....! :).
    ¸.•´¸.•*´¨) ¸.•*¨)
    (¸.•´ (¸.•`

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    1. I always love looking at life from your point of view dear Willie! I used to watch soaps as a kid with my mom, but that quickly passed. I'm blessed to have a great group of friends with very little drama, but some of my friends have run into the situations I've listed above. I like my stats, but up close and personal is always the best way when possible to get news. Happy New Year right back to you! Hugs...RO

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  4. Fascinating. I enjoyed the read. I remember soap operas from my college days but after that I never watched them At that time it was General Hospital and the Luke and Laura adventures. Hugs-Erika

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    1. Thanks for the kind words Erika. I watched them as a kid, but once I got older, I moved on to other things. I do remember Luke and Laura though(lol) Hugs and Happy New Year! RO

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  5. I'm so glad for this tidbit on 'All my children'. Watched the show with my mom as a kid. I learned a little bit about Erica Caine and the importance of keeping on the same soap and her little tribute to Dancing with the Stars. I do this one think at the beginning of every year and that is to draw up a list of successes and failures. It really makes you think. The year is not always what you think it is. And the efforts you put in it don't always draw on the best rewards for your 'true self.'

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    1. I watched it as a kid too, and remember Erica. I love the idea of looking at successes and failures to see where you've come over the year. I'm going to try that next year, and thanks for the tip! Hugs...RO

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  6. Don't do Resolutions...

    Have watched some "soaps" over the years. Everyone knows Erica, don't they? ,-)

    Interesting that the Blue Zones are warm areas. Perhaps they can grow food, for longer, each year?

    Since my husband's recent sickness, we have fully embraced fruits and veggies! And beans. They come first, as it were.

    And we are drinking 64 oz. of fluids daily!

    Believe me, you have to "work" on doing these things. Chopping veggies for salads... Buying and cooking fresh veggies... Keeping a daily chart, of liquids. Etc.

    Plus walking.

    But it is being worth it!

    Sorry it took a bout of sickness, to make us "see the light." :-)

    ✨✨✨✨✨✨

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    1. I'm so sorry about your hubby, and hope things are going much better these days. I've seen many of my friends have to change their habits after health issues, and agree that it's sad that it can take us time to see the light. One thing I drink faithfully is lots of sparkling water, and I stay away from soda. I'm told that a lot of it does have to do with the growth of the food, so you're absolutely right about the Blue Zones. Erica was something else. I'm sending some healing hugs to your hubby, and to you just because. Happy New Year! RO

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  7. We don't do resolutions here either! Hey, I think I said this before so if I did, sorry. Our Mom once had lunch with Susan Lucci at a Super Soap Weekend event (we have photos) and she gave the Mom a hair brush which is Sister Dolly's favorite!

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    1. Wow! That's pretty cool to get a brush from Susan Lucci! I remember you guys also met the great Carol Burnett. I'd love to go through your photo album one day! Hugs...RO

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  8. No resolutions here either. I fail often enough without setting myself up for more.
    A couple of years ago I stepped away from a friendship of nearly 40 years. I still miss what we had, but made the right decision. Every interaction with her I had to walk on eggshells and still OFTEN got it wrong. And was expected to grovel.
    Another great post. And hooray for freebies.

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    1. LOL! I hear you on that EC, and totally relate. 40 years is a long time to be loyal, but I'm not surprised that you were. It's sad that your friendship wasn't appreciated, and I'll bet its missed every day. Like you, the thought of walking on eggshells with friends or anyone else for that matter is just too much. Hope you can take advantage of those freebies when you can. Hugs and Happy New Year! RO

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  9. I think hot cross buns are probably off the longevity dietary list too.

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    1. LOL! You're probably very right on that Andrew! Hugs and Happy New Year! RO

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  10. I don't do formal resolutions either generally. That 80% number doesn't surprise me much lol. I would probably fall in that category!

    Blue Zones- that's super interesting. As a relatively new vegetarian that idea of longevity/ better health through plant- based foods (and the other factors of course) is fascinating to me.

    Sipping soup huh? Hmmm... :)

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    1. I've screwed it up the resolution thing plenty of times Gorgeous Greg(lol) I think that's pretty interesting too, but I still can't give up my cheeseburgers yet(lol) Happy New Year! RO

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  11. I've had friendships that are good, but most are long distance since I have moved a few times around the country. Some slid into Christmas Card friends while a few lasted across the distance. I grew up around military so I never had childhood friends that were physically close and lasted for years, but I'm still glad I had them around while our parents were working at the same base.
    LOL, one of my babysitters loved soap operas and I remember watching with her, but I always had a book in hand and barely paid attention. Probably even watched All My Children alot. LOL
    I do Crowdtap surveys to earn the gift cards and samples and I coupon. I used to do more freebies, but haven't in recent years.
    Your planners look fun and its always exciting to start a new year with one. I use them and enjoy planning ahead and list making. :)

    Have a great week, Ro!

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    1. I met three of my close friends in places I've lived, Baltimore, DC and Kansas, and even though we've all traveled around the country, we continue to be friends that talk all the time, and it's been 30+ years. One I met in the Air Force, and we've been friends for 40 years. Like you, now that I blog, I've met some cool friends online. My mom was hooked on those soaps, and it kept my interest for a minute, but didn't last long.(lol) Books were much better. I was blessed to receive several planners for Christmas, and I try to decorate all of them. Then I go get more if they're on sale(lol) Didn't know you used a Planner and hope you put up pics one day. Hugs...RO

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  12. Happy New Year dear friend. I don't make resolutions, but I set goals and see if I've met them in January of the following year.

    I love seeing your planner and am glad I can help make it a bit colorful. You have done the same for mine, too.

    I was going through my list of people I visit on my left sidebar and was surprised at how many people were no longer active or who haven't posted for at least four years. Sad how those internet friends friendships have retired and have exceeded their expiration date. Not so, my friends IRL.

    I've never watched a soap in my life, but I was happy to read about Susan Lucci. She was in a show about maids on one of the cable channels. She was the rich homeowner who had a maid. She was a ditz in tat show and I loved it every time she appeared.

    I LOVE the cute kitty at the end of your post.

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    1. I love the goals you set that I saw on your blog, and makes me wish I was a lot more organized. I have a serious addiction to Planners, as you may have noticed, and received quite a few as gifts for the holidays,(lol), but it relaxes me to work on each one, and like art therapy for me. It is sad that so many people no longer blog, but it can be quite time consuming for sure. My mom was hooked on them, and I watched a few as a kid, but no time or interest as an adult. Like you, I watched Susan Lucci on Devious Maids until it ended in 2016, and my goodness I was so hooked! The writing on that show was brilliant, and each character was perfect. Give me more cats I say! Happy New Year and Hugs...RO

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  13. I would definitely fall into that 80% because I almost always fail at my resolutions. I only set one this year and it's kind of a vague 'be more healthy' goal which entails going to the gym 3 times a week and just trying to eat more veggies and a little less meat. We'll see how it goes...

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    1. I'm with you and need to eat tons more veggies, which you already know I hate(lol) Good luck to you too! Hugs...RO

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  14. Never do resolutions either, as I know I won't keep up :) :)
    Not much of soap opera fan as you have to watch every day...rather prefer something on a weekly basis.
    I have a few long time friends but had to let go of one friend of about 10 years who used to drag me down all the time, and I got fed up eventually! I feel sorry but it had to be.

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    1. I agree, sometimes it just seems too rough with those resolutions for sure. I definitely can't do the soap opera thing these days. Too many other good shows on these days, right? It's really rough when friends just don't do friend things, and I totally feel for your. Hope all is well in your world, dear Sami! Hugs...RO

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  15. Only resolution I've ever kept is to not make resolutions.
    I'm a goal oriented person anyway so there is that. But I'm also a procrastinator when I am not looking forward to a chore. So they tend to cross each other out don't they? :-)
    And yes, there are expiration dates on some "friendships" Been there done that. Painful but necessary for self preservation.

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    1. I'm sort of that way too(lol) I do the things I like really quickly, but the unfun things hang out there a little while longer(lol) Good words for the new year - self preservation. I like it. Hope you're feeling better these days. Hugs...RO

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  16. Happy New Year RO!!! I do make resolutions but they tend to be more general because I too am a resolution breaker.
    I have one bff for over 20 years but my besty bff is my sister :)
    I can remember my Grandmother watching Days of Our LIves in the 50s and when she'd watch us after school I watched it with her, then in the 80s when I was a stay at home mom I started watching it again and was surprised to be able to pick up the storyline so quickly and with many of the same characters still there.
    I love freebies but I just don't like the hoops most sites make you jump through to get them, I don't like sharing all my personal stuff (yes quite the oxymoron since I'm always online) on all these freebie sites and it seems the more you share the more hoops they want you to jump through.

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    1. Yay to having such a great relationship with your sister! Back in the day, it was easy to get caught up when our parents and grandparents were watching, but I definitely don't watch now. It took me years to figure out the best way to get freebies without the headache, so I definitely get it. So fun when they come in though. Happy New Year and Huge Hugs...RO

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  17. Aww thanks, Ro for adding me to your post. I love sharing what freebies I get each week. Looks like you have been doing pretty good too.
    Friends are strange for me. I don't have any friends in real life because I'm such an introvert in person and have a hard time being around other people. But online, I'm not shy or introverted much at all. It's nice to be able to talk to so many great people online.

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    1. Isn't it fun to get freebies in the mail?! I think you sell yourself short, and bet that if you met me and other blogger friends you'd love all of us madly!(lol) Hugs...RO

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  18. I have also found that some friends are not really friends at all, those are the sad ones. If you were really friends they you would not loose touch

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    1. It's really sad to come to that realization, and I agree on the importance of staying in touch even if it's just once or twice a year. Hope your day is fabulous! Hugs...RO

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  19. I love seeing Mary's freebies each week and I had fun seeing the ones you shared. I think it is awesome to get something for free. Lots of interesting products to try.

    I didn't know about the blue spots- how interesting.

    Happy New Year!
    ~Jess

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    1. I've been doing the freebie thing for awhile, but it took years to fine tune it so I don't jump through hoops to get them. It's so cool to see the things that Mary and others get too. I thought that was pretty interesting too about the Blue Zones. Hugs...and Happy Tuesday! RO

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  20. All My Children was THE soap opera for many years, wasn't it?
    And speaking of friends, you're a great one.Thank you for the lovely surprise I got today.
    Hugs

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    1. My mom loved that and all the rest(lol) Thank you for the kind words and you're quite welcome. I treasure your friendship, as well. Hugs and continue to hang in there! RO

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  21. it's nice to have friends but sometimes I wonder if I'm a good friend because I don't do much for people.

    I've never saw 'all my children' but I heard about it a lot back then, I think if I wasn't distracted by books, I might have been a soap opera addict

    I like that Sara Bareilles quote.

    have a lovely day.

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    1. Of course you're a great friend Lissa!!! Everyone is different and has something special to offer, and I appreciate you so much! Give me the books over soap operas too!(lol) Her song is listened to by me very often to keep me motivated. Happy Tuesday and Hugs...RO

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  22. I used to watch the soap opera Passions when I was younger. LOL And one of my favorite shows is a British soap opera called Hollyoaks, though I'm woefully behind!!

    Oooh love all the freebies! It's fun to get a chance to try some new things out without having to buy them first.

    Happy New Year!! I don't necessarily think of things as resolutions, but just goals that I want to keep working toward. I also want to break the bigger things down into smaller steps/goals to hopefully keep me accountable. :)

    -Lauren
    www.shootingstarsmag.net

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    1. Now you've stumped me because I've never heard of that soap opera Lauren! Aren't freebies so fun to get in the mail? I agree that making the goals smaller does help with keeping them for sure, and a great idea. Hugs...RO

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  23. Having friends for twenty-plus years is an amazing gift. Kudos to you for working on those relationships.
    If someone tried to take back my Christmas gifts after giving them to me, I'm afraid their hands would be in danger. Heh.
    Have a great one, Rockin Ro.

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    1. I still have a hard time dealing with the friend who takes back gifts and gives them to other people. Just not a kind act at all. I still can't believe we've been friends for so many years either. We've traveled to so many places over the years, and still manage to stay in touch. I feel honored that they've kept me around.(lol) Sending hugs your way! RO

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  24. I don't make resolutions. They are too win or lose for me so I pick phrases or a word that helps ground me throughout the year and changes how I look at things - so it lasts longer than that year.

    I'm still friends with a few people from when I was young but I have found that my blogging buddies have been there for me in a way that my *real life* friends never are. It's been surprising and wonderful to find that network.

    Karen @ For What It's Worth

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    1. Wow! That's a really cool idea, and one I need to try next year Karen. It has been interesting how blogging buds can be supportive even when we haven't met face to face, and it's truly a special bond, so I definitely agree with you. Hugs...RO

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  25. I don't make resolutions either, I'm terrible at them lol. I have been in limbo about a friendship that I feel has run its course. It's become awkward and the conversation is very stilted. We no longer have things in common (IF we ever did), and I'm sure I was the subject of at least one round of gossip with this person. I just don't know how to walk away and it's not the best timing right now either since they're going through something pretty rough. Something to think about in the future though right?


    Happy Tuesday! :D

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    1. You hit the nail on the head Adria. When a friend starts gossiping about you behind your back, and things are awkward, it's time for a calm talk to see if things can be salvaged. Usually that conversation reveals all, and could heal the friendship or end it. I'm sending some hugs that things work out for you, and that you feel better. Hugs...RO

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  26. Great post Ro! Happy New Year!
    I use to watch All My Children all the time! I loved that soap opera!
    You got some amazing freebies! Good going girl! That is amazing!
    I love your stickers and your planners! So much fun!
    I thin it's excellent you've had friends for 20 + years!
    Big Hugs, wishing you all the best for 2019!
    Brave and Amazing! Excellent!

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    1. I've been doing the freebie thing for years, and it's always so fun. My planners that I keep collecting are my friends and working on them really relaxes me. My friends are truly wonderful! Wishing you the best year ever! Hugs...RO

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  27. Ohhh do friendship have expiration dates?? That’s a great question. I can see 80% of people bailing on their New Years Resolutions, especially the weight loss/get in shape resolutions. I can’t believe “a person who is not an enemy” that means I have millions of friends lol. Wow you have a few 20+ friends that’s impressive. I like having friends with different view than mine, nothing wrong with healthy debating lol. I used to have mean friends but I told them they were mean and they stopped being my friend so…. hahahah who cares. I love your planner, I need to get mine asap

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    1. I'd like to think that friendships last forever, but sometimes people can do some shady stuff.(lol) I agree, I love the differences because a friend that's identical to me would be pretty boring.(lol) Those planners really help to relax me. Good for you for telling those mean people to keep stepping! Happy New Year, and looking forward to seeing your planner! Hugs...RO

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  28. You got so many amazing freebies! I always forget to check those websites. As for resolutions, I never make them because I never stick with them. So far the only one I actually have kept with is a year ago I vowed to throw away less waste and start up a worm compost bin to help with that. Otherwise, I just make the resolution to be happy. :)

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    1. I've been doing the freebie thing for years, and love getting cool stuff in the mail. My resolutions tend to be about visiting new blogs, and making new friends, which is something that comes natural and is easy. Being happy is a fantastic resolution Kristin! Happy New Year and Hugs...RO

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  29. Man, I always say I am going to take advantage of those freebie things, but have never really taken the time to seek them out.. then I see photo roundups and want to get in on the action all over again, haha! - http://www.domesticgeekgirl.com

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  30. She sounds like the Soap lady version of King Henry VIII

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  31. I love Seventh Generation products. I use their cleaner all the time. It smells so good!! And yes, I do believe that friendships can have expiration dates. I've had one friend for thirty years, while others have come and gone but I cherish them all.

    Elsie

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    1. I had never heard of them, but those wipes worked out well, making me want to use more of their products, Elsie. Very cool about the 30 year friendship! I agree, even though some may have gone away, we cherish the goodness of those relationships. Hugs...RO

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  32. I can't imagine doing some of the things in your section on friendship. Taking back gifts? Secretly texting your friend's spouse behind their back? I agree, that's not friendship. I do wish I had a few close friends. I've been so family-centered and such an introvert, I haven't been good about building and maintaining them. That's something I want to work on improving. (There's a New Year's resolution for me!)

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    1. I've met so many people with sad, weird, mean-spirited and wacky stories that it would make your head spin. But I've also met many who are kind-hearted, warm and funny, and would do anything for other people. It's good to focus on family because you only get one set, but I can tell from your spirit that you'd be a great friend. Hugs...RO

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  33. I always enjoy reading your posts.
    I haven't done/made any New year's resolutions for some years now.

    Enjoy the coming weekend.

    All the best Jan

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    1. Thanks for the kind words Jan. You're the best! Happy New Year, and I'm looking forward to lots more of your informative posts this year! Hugs...RO

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  34. I learned about blue zones from my bro and sis-in-law. I first thought they were talking about political areas. Ha.
    Have a great one, Rockin Ro.
    Hugs

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  35. Another fun read RO, thank you :)

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    1. Thanks for the kind words Denise and Happy New Year to you! RO

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  36. Oh no, no one deserves a friend who gives such headaches. I had my bad share of friendships; everything is a learning opportunity, isn't it?
    Love the planners. :)
    Wish you a great year ahead. :)

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    1. Those are just a few of the things I've heard Vinitha! I agree that we learn from everything we've experienced in life. My planners (all of them aren't even posted-lol) help to relax me so much, and glad you like them. Happy New Year, and thanks so much for stopping by! Hugs...RO

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  37. Wow taking the gifts back and re-gifting them is a spot crazy, Ro. Goodness!

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  38. Ooh....Great freebies. Good job.

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  39. Your planners are great RO!
    OMG...are you describing a friend of yours (ex hopefully) that took gifts back??? That's crazy. I think some friendships need to expire. I've found that a lifelong friend is a rarity in this day and age.

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